Life is getting more vivid so the emotions is flowing livid.
The waves of personality and tsunami of different feeling from different people can drown or suffocate me.
But I’m still breathing.
Meditation was real. I step into reality.
People have the wrong ideas and I still feed them.
I still hand plates to stuff that false because I refuse to speak about it.
I have so much to say but I don’t know how to say it.
Things turned out to be nothing but a distant memory that I tried to delete.
I see it all I see it all so I said it twice so they know I meant it. It’s hard talking to someone daily and they think everything you do or say is about them it’s not.
No one is the enemy and I label no one toxic. Sometimes I feel like I’m the toxic one trying to detox.
So I break it off no it’s not you its me.
It’s wrong. I don’t know I just feel some people label me or shame me so I get defensive. I get defensive on a lot of things.
It’s like you trying to harm me so I say things that I really mean to hurt your feeling I feel like you need it yes I’m very petty.
This isn’t an apology because I’ve done nothing wrong.
Writing making me feel free I feel more at ease.
But they label me and try to play me oh she’s just going through that same ole thing or it’s just the same ole drama ting.
But really I’m just tired.
Really it’s just messing with my energy.
Man it’s sad I guess somethings ain’t meant to be.
I never run away that’s not me.
But it’s messing with me mentally
I’m deactivating soon so many people shouldn’t worry about what I have to tweet or post anymore.
If they want me just look at my blog or email and you’ll find me.
It’s never because we don’t talk every day.
Because I’ve done with talking.
Only time its relevance when its gossip or stories but nobody believes me .
But really it’s the lack of trust you gave me.
Man I don’t know what it is from here but many people and not only you just don’t care.
I’m generally speaking I always generally speak.
I have a whole contact book 35 count and no one check for me not that I need them to check on me but one person does and one goddess with amazing voice does when she can and I understand.
I am not with using people to get to the next level. I don’t force.
I connect naturally and I will reach the top with me.
Things may be lost but I’m still traveling to move to GA and I’m going to do it I promised myself.
I don’t care if anyone doubts me; I don’t doubt me.
@Nashacarter: This week I peeped a lot,learned a lot , seen a lot , erased a lot, been mutual a lot and responding less. Growing and I will continue to grow
Strangers send me paragraphs while the known one word me.
Smh I’ve been watching everything.
This post ain’t for everybody.
This post is for the ones who sub me and think I don’t see.
This post is for the ones who disrespect with their other team.
This post is for everybody in you’re group chat .
This post is for the ones who don’t like me or get me I’m praying for ya.
This post is for me.
This post is me reflecting.
This post is real feelings
This post is pure this post is me
I still believe
This post is hitting a 100 topics so they can see me
This post might seem like a code so you might can never read me.
This post is my mind.
This post is some thoughts.
I’m not looking for sympathy.
I love you all who reads and can relate.
Sorry for my out burst in just human.
Thank you for the support.
Thank you for the respect.
From here it’s not up to me I can’t see the future.
I know right now we vibing with different energy and we stop connecting.
5:12 to 5:15
I pray you get it.
I pray we all have better health and grow mentally. I pray for peace and love and eternity.